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The Illusion of Perfect Homeschooling
This Homeschool Mom’s Guide to Purposeful Living is for those of us who started this journey with a vision of perfect schedules and flawless lessons, only to find reality had other plans.
We often start this homeschool thing with a vision of perfect schedules and flawless lessons, only to find reality had other plans. Rigid expectations accompany the early days. We envision completing every curriculum page, silencing critics, and adhering to strict schedules.
But reality has a way of rewriting our plans. As one mom shared, “We’re gonna do all 5 subjects every single day” but that morphs into understanding that learning happens outside the confines of a workbook.
“I didn’t like any of the interruptions. I wanted continuity as though that somehow meant that what I was doing was more perfect.”
Teresa Wiedrick, Homeschool Life Coach
A Homeschool Mom’s Guide to Purposeful Living
We’ll unpack the unrealistic expectations that often plague our journeys and explore how to prioritize our well-being for a sustainable and joyful homeschool life experience. We’ll move beyond the illusion of perfection and into practical strategies that nurture both our children and ourselves.
Redefining Educational Success
True education isn’t about checking boxes; it’s about igniting curiosity and fostering engagement. Child-inspired learning, where interests like Arabian horses or a deep dive on the British monarchy drive the process, leads to genuine learning.
We need to begin to learn how to identify child-inspired learning…that’s the best learning…who cares what somebody put in a book and said, ‘Hey, you should learn this in fourth grade.’
“The end goal of an education is that you are fully engaged in your life…living this life out the way they’re supposed to live it out.”
Why Your Well-Being Matters Most
If you’re running on fumes if you’re trying to pour from an empty cup, and it’s not working, and you’re thinking, “Just one more lesson, just one more chore,” but your body’s screaming for sleep, for real food, for a moment of peace…that voice telling you to sacrifice everything? It’s a lie.
A big, fat, destructive lie. You’re not a martyr; you’re a human. And humans need fuel. You need sleep, you need nutrients, you need to address that brain fog that’s making you feel like you’re losing it. If you don’t address your needs first, you’re not going to be any good to anyone, especially not your kids.
You must care for yourself first. This means:
- Prioritizing 7-9 hours of sleep
- Nourishing your body with real food
- Balancing brain chemistry
- Allowing yourself rest and vulnerability
Breaking the Martyrdom Cycle
But how do we shift gears? Look, you know that friend of yours, the one who’s always bragging about how busy she is? The one who’s running on fumes and pretending it’s a superpower?
You know you’d tell her to knock it off, right?
You’d say, “Girlfriend, you’re not fooling anyone. You’re exhausted, and it’s not sustainable.” You’d tell her to stop pretending she doesn’t have limits, that “just praying harder” isn’t a substitute for real self-care. You’d tell her it’s okay, even necessary, to ask for help, to let her partner or friends lighten the load. And you’d definitely tell her that investing in her health isn’t a luxury, it’s a necessity.
So, be that friend to yourself. Stop lying to yourself about how much you can handle. Stop pretending you’re a machine. You deserve better than that.
Stop pretending you’ve got it all together and start being intentional about how you live.
Practical Strategies for Intentional Living
Remember, you’re not just educating—you’re raising humans. Your journey is unique, your kids are unique, and YOU are unique–and there’s not one “right” way to homeschool anyway!
You know you’d tell your friend, ‘You’re not just a teacher, you’re raising people. What’s your family’s real goal here? What are you trying to build?’ And you’d tell her it’s okay to admit she doesn’t have all the answers, to reach out, to stop trying to solo this. Now, ask yourself those same questions. “We are all called to be us. We have this opportunity as homeschool families to enable a remarkable raising-up experience for our kids.
You know how you tell your friend, “Girlfriend, you’re trying to control everything, and it’s driving you crazy?”
You’d tell her perfection is a myth, that some days, learning looks like climbing a tree, not filling out a worksheet. And you’d remind her that those 180 “school days” are just a guideline, that learning happens all the time, not just between 9 and 3.
Oh, and you’d tell her to ditch the ramen and leftovers and feed herself like she cares because good food fuels a good brain. You’d tell her it’s okay, even smart, to ask for help, to reach out to friends or maybe even a professional.
You’d say, “You know that anxiety that’s got you spinning? That’s not your normal. When your brain’s balanced, you’re not stuck on repeat.”
And you’d definitely tell her, “You’re on a hamster wheel going nowhere, and you’re exhausted. Stop spinning.
Find what fixes your brain, find what gets you off that wheel.” Now, be that friend to yourself. Stop pretending you’ve got it all together and start being intentional about how you live.
The Power of Surrender: Spiritual and Emotional Resilience
When challenges arise—because they will–like health issues, learning struggles, personal doubts—practice surrender.
This doesn’t mean passive acceptance, but intentional trust and flexible action. You know you’d tell your friend, ‘Life throws curveballs, and you can’t control it all. Stop fighting it. Adapt, trust, take the next step. You know things change, so stop pretending they won’t.’ Now, tell yourself that.
“We are all called to be us. We have this opportunity as homeschool families to enable a remarkable raising up experience for our kids.”
You are doing important work. Some days will feel messy, and that’s okay.
You know what you’d tell your friend, and now it’s time to tell yourself the same: ditch the perfection, prioritize your well-being, ask for help, and surrender to the fact that this journey is messy, beautiful, and uniquely yours.
Question: What one small step can you take today to heal your relationship with yourself? Your homeschool journey will thank you for it.
If you’re feeling overwhelmed, stuck, or just need someone to help you unpack those challenges and get clear on your next steps, book a conversation with Teresa.
Reach out, and let’s map out a homeschool mom life that will actually work for you.
Connect with Laurie Hammer:
- Check out her Podcast: Take Back My Brain on Youtube
- Laurie’s Website
Teresa Wiedrick
I help homeschool mamas shed what’s not working in their homeschool & life, so they can show up authentically, purposefully, and confidently in their homeschool & life.
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